Despite My Wishes

But happy endings lost to heartless waves
And sinking drowning dreams are lost in the cold wet dark
The light does not follow so far
But down there
You are not alone
And you will wish you were
When I am lost
Please come find me
Do leave me to myself
Though I cast you away
You must return
Or love falls to dust
And the world is undone.

Changing Everything

But I want to give in
And give up
Better men than me could not change
And who am I?
I want to fall back into darkness
As it gently tears me to peaces from the inside out
In what world could I possibly ever hope to triumph?
In what world could I ever imagine changing?
Who am I that I should think I could be better?
That I could change?

I am nothing.

I am no one.

But then there was the incarnation.

Did not God become a man?

Blood and scales and screaming pain
I beg you to change what I cannot change-
My heart.

Forgive me and show me flying horses.

Restore me and let me be held.

Let that tiny seed grow.

Reaching Out

But really we want to connect
And I want to connect
With someone
and something.

Light falls and rises up
Flowers bloom and poets die
Seasons change with every cup
That we drink until we fly.

And it is hard to open
And so hard to trust
But the insides will burst
And the heart rend
And all to peaces fall.

Could we talk?

Would you talk with me?

And when we feel alone we do things
And then live with what that brings
And then we dream of other nights
And days that never came.

But though another is not the answer
It is not against the answer either
And in another we see real love
And then can oft believe.