A Weight Unto Death

You left three children
and a woman
when you took your own life.

and now when I ski
I will always remember
that last time we went together.

And all of those times you
you looked in people’s eyes
and they felt connected…

I know why
I know what
but they mostly didn’t get it.

They just thought you were so nice
(and you were, of course)
they just thought you understood.

They didn’t know how
they didn’t know the price you paid
to understand, to connect, to be so “nice.”

I know that when you saw them
when you looked into their eyes
you felt whatever they felt.

I know that if they were hurting
You were hurting
and if they were happy…

But all that feeling
Comes with a price
and it is heavy.

To feel what another feels
To take it on yourself
This is a hard way to bear another’s burden.

Because It’s Hard

In a world filled with pain
I’ve had my share
and yet
the people who’ve had much more
always seem to find me
I’m not sure why
or how
but they always come to me
and I don’t mind no more.

Do you know how hard it is to bear another’s burden?
Of course you do
Do you ever feel another’s pain?
I hope so.

When the light goes out
and the room goes dark
and you look outside
only to find
the sun has died
or been eclipsed
(but you can’t tell which)
When the air is sucked
strait from your heaving lungs
and your sweat stings your eyes
and the room begins to spin–

then perhaps it is time
to be the friend
that you always wished you had,
to be that friend
to someone else.

Seeing Inside

I remember that sparkle in your eye

It was undefinable; it was magic

I could always look inside

But you were the only one I knew who could do it too.

 

It’s hard when you feel all of their hurt

To see something good

And say something nice

I usually don’t; I just hurt with them.

 

I wonder if you avoid peoples eyes

I do.

You don’t usually look inside and get to see

That sparkle.