Where Are You?

Blistering morning come to find
A place of peace from my own mind
That let’s me ward the harshest chill
And keeps me from the growing ill.

Torn to find the pieces whole
Lost to find the wand’ring soul
Left behind to fight or die
Always wanting to ask why.

Least in numbers here we wait
At the fore behind the gate
Never do we seem to see
All the blessings found in Thee.

The Heart

20 children no longer scream
in a place that their parents thought safe
And 20 children died by a knife
two years ago in a faraway place.

Was it 178 kids that were killed
by the drones near Pakistan?
And ones and two’s all over the world
With guns and knives and hands?

How many children died in a car,
Someone drunk at the wheel?
How many children died from the cold?
Their little toes could not feel.

Governments and floods and citizens too
Mentally disabled and sociopaths
Children have died since children were born
And we think policy change will help.

How many children were killed by two bombs?
During World War II?
How many children were killed in the flood?
That God sent upon the earth.

People get angry and shocked and scared
And grief tells two lies so hard to resist,
“I am the only one right here.”
And, “Never, ever again.”

But when the weapons are taken they don’t go away
They merely change hands in the night
And the hearts of men are still just the same
And there, is always the fight.

But wherever you are, know this is true,
“You are not alone.”
And whatever you scream for someone to do
Remember your own heart.

We break when we see the little ones die
In Sudan and Rwanda and France
In China, Australia, and Chicago too
We cry for the loss in our hearts.

And nothing makes sense.

I want it to stop, but I have seen
The record thousands of years long
In every place in every time
Something always is wrong.

That something cannot be addressed at all
If one refuses to see
Where the problem truly lies
And how it came to be.

The Strangest Place I Have Ever Been

I have traveled across the sea
To foreign lands with strange hard tongues
And been a stranger there to see
But this is stranger still by far.

I have climbed so high to see
If maybe on the tops of peaks
There was a way to simply be
But this is stranger still by far.

I have served a loyal dog
Jumped to answer every call
I wore that green in every fog
But this is stranger still by far.

I have studied till my eyes went cross
And read the stacks as if on fire
Searching for an answer lost
But this is stranger still by far.

I have been in love with all my heart
And kissed the fairest maiden found
Enthralled I was by beauty’s mark
But this is stranger still by far.

I have lost most precious everything
And felt the depths of cold despair
And searched half crazy for that ring
But this is stranger still by far.

I’ve almost died so many times
I could not even feign to count
And on the edge of ghostly climes
But this is stranger still by far.

“Love thy neighbor as thyself.”
And here I come at last
How might I begin to see
To love myself at all.

Understanding Heaven

I don’t understand heaven at all.

I have never been there.

I’m sure I could give you all sorts of answers from books
and tell with sophisticated terms of art what is and isn’t described
in one particular book.

But I have never been there
and don’t know that it stays the same
and couldn’t tell you much at all
of all the beasts both wild and tame.

And people with their anger shout
And cry and scream and shake their fists
And claim that it could never be
And rail against the thought of lists.

And so the world continues on
spinning with no heart to feel.

Are there streets so paved with gold?
Are there gates beset with pearls?
Do the agèd not grow old?
I could not tell you, not at all.

For I have never been.

And this is how I understand heaven:

If God sends me to hell forever
I will bend my knee and praise Him still.

How Will I Know the Way Back Home?

I don’t know what to pray
I feel as numb with heavy limbs
Like lead fills all my veins
A small victory sometimes seems
Far too little
amidst all the growing agony.
To do right is hard
and wrong so easy
and so the world tears itself apart.
I long for companionship
but fear all sorts of pain
my old friend who eats at me
is both a comfort
and a fear
and small victories seem so small
and the road seems far too long
and death, like a friendly cloak,
lurks in the shadows of every room.
The light begins but finds such shade
and darkness steals the left and right
and we in finite final form
fear to tread at all.
Would you believe in all this filth?
Would you believe with strawless bricks?
The fog is thick even in day
and the way has grown obscured.
But faith, unasked for,
hidden deep,
holds an ember with a fire
burning at the heart to keep
all it’s holy right desire.
Explanations fail the heart
after years of beatings grim
but faith, from reason, not apart
holds a fire in the night…